The other day, someone was retelling a conversation that they'd had. This week alone, I have heard stories about people's lives from the perspective of another. It was very interesting.
Both stories were about life. Just plain old everyday life. One story was about a married couple and the other about a couple that is planning a wedding. Both stories ended with, "They're life is perfect. They did everything the right way."
The second story was about my friend Katy. She is a successful lawyer, she works for a great firm, bought a house with her fiance earlier this year and she is currently planning their wedding. She is always dressed in the latest fashions and her home looks like a Pottery Barn catalog. She is smart, funny and very beautiful. When you see her with her future husband, in their five bedroom home, with their brand new cars, wearing the best clothes you've ever seen and watch as their pure breed, well trained pets sit at their side, you can't help but think that they've got it all.
Katy and I laughed as our other friend told us this story and when it was all done and told, Katy was quiet. I never would have imagined that this would bother her, but it did. Katy began to explain that she has problems and her lifestyle isn't really her and how she wishes people would just get to know her and give her a chance. She told us about how caught up she is on some committee and how she thought those other women were her friends, but how cruel they can be to one another. How everyone judges her on what she has, rather then who she is.
I was amazed at this. I never really thought of her as a "lucky" girl, but rather a successful one. She worked hard for her home, car and dogs, why would anyone judge her otherwise? Then the conversation changed to me and my life. How happy I am and lucky that I have such a great guy who enjoys being with me and doing the same things as I do. They started to tell me how wonderful my life is, how complete and how they wish they were where Tim and I are, just starting out.
This made me laugh. My life isn't bad, but it isn't the greatest. I wish I had a new car, I wish I had a five bedroom pottery barn home, I wish I could just go shopping whenever I wanted to. I wish I could afford to go travel the world, but I can't. I don't have any of those things, but I am happy. Do I want those things? Ah, who wouldn't?
I think life is about the journey you take, not the spot you're in. Someday Tim and I will have a home, with new cars and throughout these years, we'll laugh and walk the path the leads to those things. For now, I can't wait for the one bedroom apartment with limited amount of furniture.
And Katy's life, though very different from mine, is a beautiful one. Katy, you've worked hard to get where you are. You shouldn't feel bad or guility. You earned it and you walked a path that led you to your beautiful life. I wish you all the love, joy and happiness that a lifetime can bring!
So I suppose that the moral of the story is to just be happy with what you've got. The grass may seem greener on the other side, but sometimes it isn't!!! Oh and, no one's life is perfect, no matter what anyone tells you. We all have our struggles, our fights, our failures, but its all about getting up and trying again.